These enterprising Gluons solve the classic dilemma of having your cake and eating it, too. Not to mention its benefit to society by creating a product with absolutely no calories. And they get to play with a leaf blower.
The Gluon Academy
Gluons appear to humans as small bears and other soft animals and insist they predate the force identified by physicists. Gluons claim that they hold the universe together and that physicists ought to give credit where credit is due.
The Gluon Academy 
Gluon Sighting: Ashford Castle, Cong, Ireland:
Hello, I’m writing to you from the top of the wainscoting behind the third red velvet curtain on the second floor of the East Wing. Arwen’s husband Chris thought this would be a good place for me to hide and wait for another child to find me, since Arwen has no more need of earthly friends. I still have my hand-carved wooden spoon for eating peanut butter right out of the jar.
There is a woman who sometimes cleans in this corridor, and I know she has a grand-daughter who is partial to bears. I have high hopes.